top of page


Do I feel safe in my home? Have I been forced into sexual acts against my will? Do I feel afraid or threatened in my relationship? Have I had a friend or family member murdered? Was someone I love killed in a vehicular crash while a crime was being committed? Have I experienced a situation in which I was left feeling violated?


Including, but not limited to victims of domestic violence, sexual assault, stalking, trafficking, robbery, burglary, and any other violent crimes.

  • Sense of Violation​

  • Confusion

  • Anger/Frustration

  • Increased Fears

  • Sense of Guilt/Why Me?

  • Loss of Control

  • Thoughts of Dying

  • Horror

  • No Recollection

  • Disbelief

  • Helplessness

  • Lost of Trust



Signs Of A Healthy Relationship

  • Make Decisions Jointly

  • Have Own Space

  • Treat Each Other With Kindness

  • Feel Safe with Partner

  • Respect Each Other

  • Honor Each Others Family & Friends

  • Respect Boundaries

  • Disagreements Happen, But Do Not Include Violence or Put-Downs

  • Open And Truthful Communication

  • Can Express Yourself Freely And Honestly

  • You Like Yourself And Your Partner

  • You Find Balance

  • Your Relationship Is Your Safe Place

Signs Of An Abusive Relationship

  • Unpredictability

  • Extreme Jealously

  • Controls Finances

  • Blaming you for anything bad that happens

  • Checks up on you regularly

  • Blames you for the abuse

  • Threatens your family, friends or pets

  • Destroys your belongings

  • Calls you hurtful names

  • Limits where you can go or who you can see

  • Forces you to do things you do not want to do 

  • Insults you

  • Hits walls, drives dangerously, or does things to scare you



Sexual abuse is any unwanted sexual activity, with perpetrators using force, making threats or taking advantage of victims where consent is not given or gained by threats or acts of violence.

  • Immediate reactions from abuse include shock, fear or disbelief.

  • Sexual abuse is a crime.

  • Long term symptoms could include; anxiety, fear or post-traumatic stress disorder.

  • In most cases sexual abuse is committed by someone the victim knows.

  • A victim does not have to get beaten up to be raped.

  • Sexual abuse can happen to men, women and children of all races, social status, races and cultures.

  • Sexual abuse is never the victim's fault, no matter what they wore, where they went or what they did.


Families and friends of homicide victims experience a sudden traumatic, life changing loss. A loved one has been taken and you, the survivor, must reorganize your life around this void and work towards finding a new daily "normal".


As a survivor of a homicide victim, you may experience some confusing reactions. Remember that you are a normal person having a normal response to a traumatic event. 

Survivors may experience a variety of emotions, some of which are listed below. There is no right or wrong way to grieve. Each person is different, and may grieve in their own unique and personal way.


  • Numbness

  • Change In Sleep Patterns

  • Tightness In The Chest Or Throat

  • Oversensitivity

  • Lack Of Energy

  • Body Aches

  • Muscle Weakness

  • Exhaustion


  • Denial

  • Irritability/Anger

  • Shock/Numbness

  • Guilt/Sadness

  • Anxiety

  • Helplessness

  • Abandonment/Yearning

  • Fear/Terror


  • Sleep/Appetite Change

  • Social Withdrawal

  • Dreams Of The Deceased

  • Avoidance

  • Restless/Over Activity

  • Crying/No Emotions

  • Clinging to Reminders

  • Forgetfulness

Helpful Hints

  1. Listen to your body. Identify possible reasons and then take care of yourself through proper exercise, rest and nutrition. 

  2. Don't be afraid to ask for help. Friends and family want to help, but often are not sure how to approach or offer help.

  3. It's ok to change, keep or modify traditions. 

  4. Make lists. Concentration and memory can be affected by grief.

  5. Tears are healing. They are also inevitable and unpredictable, so give yourself permission to cry.

If you can relate to the information on this page, help is available.

ICASA's mission is to promote a society free from sexual violence. As a coalition, we believe we can accomplish this lofty goal by improving the programs and services available to survivors and by supporting communities to prevent sexual violence before it occurs.

Crime Victim Assistance Division advocates for the rights and the needs of crime victims and ensures that all victims and survivors will be treated with dignity and respect.

The Domestic Violence & Victim Service Call Center has trained advocates available 24/7 to talk confidentially with victims/survivors of abuse/crimes seeking resources or information.

The Iowa Coalition Against Domestic Violence seeks to engage all people in a movement to change the social and political systems that perpetuate violence against women.  We do this through education, advocacy and quality services.

bottom of page